Turning the tide

"More than 90 percent of my clients are women of different ages and from different backgrounds. Of them, some are married, while some are not; some are conservative, while some are open-minded; some are aggressive, while some are passive. From what they all tell me, I seem to figure out a similar story, which I describe as 'depression in women'," the psychologist says.

Although its symptoms don't necessarily fit the diagnostic criteria for major depression, it is a depressive feeling that many women are facing, and they need help and support, rather than diagnosis.

It is also her story. After graduating from the Central Academy of Fine Arts in Beijing, Zhang tried various jobs. In 2010, she opened a small ice cream shop in Xiamen called Qingtian Jian, which meant it only opened on sunny days. In her friends' eyes, she is a good storyteller and healer.

Her story took an unexpected turn in April 2013, when she was diagnosed with depression. Two months later, her doctor suggested she receive hospital treatment, but she rejected it for "being afraid of going mad". Alongside taking various antidepressants and seeing psychologists, Zhang started to write about her days living with depression.

This became a book — 1,003 Days in Another Universe, published in 2018 — sharing her story with people facing a similar situation.

"Feeling exhausted and broken, physically and mentally, I cannot speak a word these days, but always wake up screaming with night terrors," Zhang writes.

At her nadir, she could not eat, or even get out of bed.