Traditionally, New Year is the point when people look for change.

Mix in a dose of the post-Christmas blues, and it's hardly surprising that this is the prime time for women to end their relationships.

But a new self-help book called Don't Be That Girl claims it can help to identify the self-defeating behaviours that prevent women getting the most out of their partnerships.

Could you be driving the perfect guy away with insecurities and misplaced priorities?

It's written by Travis Stork, a casualty doctor and expert in mental and emotional well-being, who starred as The Bachelor in a hit U.S. reality show of the same name that saw him date 25 women in a bid to find "the one".

He never did, but it gave him a real insight into women.

As well as this extensive dating experience, he regularly sees people at their weakest moments when they wind up in his casualty and has heard more than one late-night sob story from women who are insecure in their relationships, unhappy and desperate.

You can understand why: he's got the sort of shoulders that look like they'd be good to cry on.

Anyway, after 25 failed dates and years of wiping away the tears, he believes that the key to a successful relationship is changing yourself.

"It may not actually be the man that's at fault; it may be you," Travis explains.

"He may not necessarily afraid of commitment. He may only be afraid of a commitment with you.